so i am slowly trying to tell myself to stop living in a fairytale. i could tell myself over and over again, that everything happens for a reason, but to be honest, i really hate when people say that to me. i don't like it when people ALWAYS tell you what you need to hear. I'm the kind of girl, that when it's okay, i need you to once in awhile tell me something that i want to hear. cause lately, reality seems to be slapping me in the face a lot.. and all it's doing is making me mad. I've been getting stressed over little things because i have too much going through my mind. and when i try and just, relax.. it seems literally- impossible. something is always bothering me, and there is something i always wanna say when i shouldn't. to friends and sometimes family. DRAMA DRAMA(: whatever.. and last night when i talked to Sarah, i got mad about something so stupid. yeah, i know WHAT made me mad, but i didn't get why i was.. dumb things like that are always pushing me off the edge when they shouldn't.. but you know what i found out..? i don't think i could ever tell someone that i couldn't live without them. because, to be honest, if i ever knew someone that i couldn't live without, i would not want anything to do with them. i would be scared of losing them and that would be the only thing my life would revolve around- is that person. i CAN live without you, because i choose not to let myself be that vulnerable to another human being that would most likely be perfectly fine without ME. yes, i absolutely love some people that i would be crushed over losing them, but i CAN live without you because I'm not going to end my life because i don't have you.. i know that i would be able to find someone else that loved me just as much if not more. and i feel like such a bad guy when i write this, cause it seems like i am SO independent and i don't need anyone. but that isn't it. i NEED people to love me and always be there for me, but i won't let anything or anyone stop me from being happy and doing what is best for ME.. for anybody who actually reads this, just.. don't forget that i will always care about you..
Friday, December 4
don't forget that i will always care about you..
so i am slowly trying to tell myself to stop living in a fairytale. i could tell myself over and over again, that everything happens for a reason, but to be honest, i really hate when people say that to me. i don't like it when people ALWAYS tell you what you need to hear. I'm the kind of girl, that when it's okay, i need you to once in awhile tell me something that i want to hear. cause lately, reality seems to be slapping me in the face a lot.. and all it's doing is making me mad. I've been getting stressed over little things because i have too much going through my mind. and when i try and just, relax.. it seems literally- impossible. something is always bothering me, and there is something i always wanna say when i shouldn't. to friends and sometimes family. DRAMA DRAMA(: whatever.. and last night when i talked to Sarah, i got mad about something so stupid. yeah, i know WHAT made me mad, but i didn't get why i was.. dumb things like that are always pushing me off the edge when they shouldn't.. but you know what i found out..? i don't think i could ever tell someone that i couldn't live without them. because, to be honest, if i ever knew someone that i couldn't live without, i would not want anything to do with them. i would be scared of losing them and that would be the only thing my life would revolve around- is that person. i CAN live without you, because i choose not to let myself be that vulnerable to another human being that would most likely be perfectly fine without ME. yes, i absolutely love some people that i would be crushed over losing them, but i CAN live without you because I'm not going to end my life because i don't have you.. i know that i would be able to find someone else that loved me just as much if not more. and i feel like such a bad guy when i write this, cause it seems like i am SO independent and i don't need anyone. but that isn't it. i NEED people to love me and always be there for me, but i won't let anything or anyone stop me from being happy and doing what is best for ME.. for anybody who actually reads this, just.. don't forget that i will always care about you..
